Do you do Leadership Coaching? A client asked me this recently.
Um, yes, that’s definitely the whole point. Absolutely I do. But wait a second, it seems like maybe my blog or marketing for my coaching seems… otherwise? Like it’s all about having a better life and maybe not getting better at your job?
I can see where the two might get confused.
I focus alot on underlying beliefs. Mindset shifts. Like the difference between believing you’ll be successful or not.
And what that might mean in terms of what you end up being able to do or not (as a new CEO, director, entrepreneur, or… you fill in the blank). And how that contributes to determining the options you see as available to you (or not).
Essentially, an aspect of the coaching I do is working with the unconscious. Gently and indirectly, using metaphors to shift our current way of being into a new way of being. We don’t consciously try to change who we are: that doesn’t really work. We tend to not want to kill off parts of ourselves. Our unconscious wants to protect all of us, even those parts inconvenient to what we want, because they were created for a good reason even if they’re blocking us now…
When we think of getting results, we generally think of performing better. And when we think of performing better we tend to think of having the mad skillz. And when we think of excellent skills, we think: trainings, courses, and how to guides! Or mentors – people “like us” who are further along the path who can show us the way. Because, we think, if only we learn the skills, we’ll achieve the thing we want to do or be (the amazing CEO, the shockingly successful entrepreneur, etc.)
And, ABSOLUTELY, we need training. We need mentorship. We need courses and how to guides. Sure. And that’s part of leadership coaching too. To identify those helpful tools that will accelerate you toward that thing you want. But guess what? Our culture overly focuses on these tools, and it’s why women (in particular) need some support in the realm of the unconscious. Because that’s where we get stuck. Not by taking a 5th degree. Or another training.
What are the underlying mantras running the show in your world that you’re unaware of?
Keeping you back from full on:
- Boundaries
- Income/Salary/Promotion
- Fantastic relationships with your collaborators, bosses, clients, and staff (or real and less comfortable relationships with them if that’s what’s needed)
- The career and life you want
– Is it that it’s unsafe to stand out (being on top for some reason isn’t completely ok)?
– That you don’t really know what you’re doing (imposter syndrome)?
– That you can’t be successful on your own (security comes from something other than yourself)?
– That you can’t ask for what you want (because then you’d be selfish, not nice, egotistical, etc.)?
– That you need everyone’s permission first (so no one’s upset with you and you’ve made sure everyone likes you)?
Whatever it is, that’s the thing that leadership coaching unhooks you from. Let’s you grow out of. Finds other options for. Transcends and includes (because trying to divorce it just brings it closer). Dampens the fear enough that something else starts to take hold. A quiet confidence. A bravery. A truth. A heart-centred decision. A tough call. A you-led life.
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